Psycho By The Bay: The Trip of a Preteen Lifetime

Summer 1998. I was thirteen, going into eighth grade. I attended a pretty large nondenominational church in Oregon with a big youth group. That summer they were offering a smaller-group trip to the California Bay Area to visit Great America Theme Park, Marine World Theme Park, the Winchester Mystery House, and Alcatraz. This adventurous introvert knew she had to be on that trip and begged her parents to sign her up last minute. They acquiesced, and in late August we hopped in that 15-passenger van, drove ten hours down Interstate 5 and crashed on the floor of some church in Los Gatos.

The days we visited Great America and Marine World, our only instructions were to stay in groups of four and reconvene at a designated place at lunch and closing time. We didn’t have an adult assigned to us. We picked our own groups. And remember, this was 1998. We did not have cell phones. We had our group of four, a physical map of the theme park, and a film camera. And the freedom was absolutely thrilling.

We had to be responsible for each other, for our own money, and for keeping track of time. The day we spent at Marine World, my group chose to ride a water ride first thing in the morning. We bore the consequences of being wet for the rest of the day. Including into the night when it was discovered that our whole group was locked out of the church upon our return. But we survived. And what a good story!

In reflecting on a pretty charmed childhood and thinking about experiences I hope to replicate for my own children, this story leapt out at me. I share it to encourage parents that the time you spend pouring into developing kids of integrity and character is absolutely worth it, and as they grow older it is important to step back, trust that you have done your best, and trust your children with freedom to go away and make their own choices. Your character building has laid the foundation, and giving your preteens and teens space to be trustworthy within independence is just the next step of reaping benefits.

In light of how teenage culture has evolved in the last 21 years, how social media consumes our teenagers, how gun violence makes everyone anxious to go to the mall or even to school, how attached we are to keeping constant tabs on our children, I’m amazed that my parents ever allowed me to go on Psycho by the Bay. But I am so grateful.

I always come back to this trip in my mind when I think about how thankful I am to be confident in my ability to make good choices, a confidence that was present in my teen years and remains now as an adult.

Trips like this in a pre-cell-phone world forced us kids to rely on each other and relate to each other in person. The adults in our life spoke volumes of their trust in us. They gave us guidelines and expected us to stick to them. We knew the consequences if we deviated otherwise, but we were presumed innocent first, even as preteens. Oh that my children would have this opportunity.